As many of you know I am an artist. I have become very skilled at the art form that I practice, but I have recently started practicing a new art. The art of not knowing! I have been practicing this art a lot lately, and I am not sure I am getting any better at it.
"So what projects are you working on?" I hear you ask. Well first it is where to live after school if over. I am officially done with school at the end of August, and I have no idea what is coming next. I have so many options that could or could not work, and lots of places that I could go. I am trying to decide where to live, and what I am wanting to do when I grow up. This is not something that is extremely overwhelming, but it is something that I find difficult to deal with.
I have so many factors that are at play in all these situation. I love and miss my family, but I know that California might have more job options. Oklahoma is cheaper. California is where I have been doing ministry, and have a youth group I am extremely invested in. There is so many options that options begin to just blend together.
Then many of you may not know but I have also been having some weird medical issues. It has been going on for almost 3 months now, and we have not been able to have any answers. Every test they have done has come back normal. All the doctors keep saying that "they don't see anything wrong, but obviously there is something wrong." I am having to keep waiting it out to find out what is going on. I find myself to often on WebMD trying to see what I might have***disclaimer*** Never do this because you just feel like you are about to die right then and there***disclaimer***
With all this waiting I am having to just sit in it. I can't make a plan or decide a path because all of these things play into each other. I have to trust that God knows what is going on, and that I will come out stronger on the other side. I know that God has a plan! I just sometimes wish he would be willing to give me a map ahead of time, but since he has not I just have to wait it out.
"So what projects are you working on?" I hear you ask. Well first it is where to live after school if over. I am officially done with school at the end of August, and I have no idea what is coming next. I have so many options that could or could not work, and lots of places that I could go. I am trying to decide where to live, and what I am wanting to do when I grow up. This is not something that is extremely overwhelming, but it is something that I find difficult to deal with.
I have so many factors that are at play in all these situation. I love and miss my family, but I know that California might have more job options. Oklahoma is cheaper. California is where I have been doing ministry, and have a youth group I am extremely invested in. There is so many options that options begin to just blend together.
Then many of you may not know but I have also been having some weird medical issues. It has been going on for almost 3 months now, and we have not been able to have any answers. Every test they have done has come back normal. All the doctors keep saying that "they don't see anything wrong, but obviously there is something wrong." I am having to keep waiting it out to find out what is going on. I find myself to often on WebMD trying to see what I might have***disclaimer*** Never do this because you just feel like you are about to die right then and there***disclaimer***
With all this waiting I am having to just sit in it. I can't make a plan or decide a path because all of these things play into each other. I have to trust that God knows what is going on, and that I will come out stronger on the other side. I know that God has a plan! I just sometimes wish he would be willing to give me a map ahead of time, but since he has not I just have to wait it out.
